Tommen And Margaery Age Gap
TL;DR: The age gap between King Tommen and Queen Margaery in Game of Thrones is approximately 8 years. Tommen is portrayed as around 12 years old during their marriage, while Margaery is about 20. This gap emphasizes the political nature of their union rather than a romantic relationship.

Queen Margaery
Born 283 AC

King Tommen
Born 291 AC
Tommen And Margaery Age Difference Infographic

Why Did Game of Thrones Create This Specific Age Gap Problem?

The showrunners aged up Tommen from 8 to roughly 12-14 years old, but here’s the kicker—they cast a 16-year-old actor opposite a 32-year-old actress. The book’s political chess game about an unconsummated child marriage transformed into something that made viewers squirm for entirely different reasons.
In George R.R. Martin’s novels, the age gap served a clear purpose: Cersei could scheme against Margaery by claiming the queen sought satisfaction elsewhere since she couldn’t consummate with a literal child. HBO flipped the script entirely, making their marriage night canon and forcing Cersei to arm religious fanatics just to compete.
The math that matters: Book Tommen was 8-9, Show Tommen was ambiguously teenaged, Actor Tommen was 16-17. Meanwhile, Margaery stayed consistently adult across all versions.
What Made Their On-Screen Dynamic So Uncomfortable?

The wedding night scene in “High Sparrow” (S5E3) became instantly notorious, but not for the reasons you’d expect in Westeros. Viewers weren’t bothered by the fictional age gap—they were processing the visible real-world gap between the actors.
Dean-Charles Chapman insisted in interviews that filming wasn’t awkward, praising Natalie Dormer’s professionalism. He even revealed the showrunners joked they’d “done him a favour” by writing him “a cheeky little sex scene”—a comment that aged like milk in the summer sun.
But Dormer? She called it “very awkward” and dropped this revelation: she initiated a “whole conversation” about rewriting Margaery’s first seduction scene because a direct sexual advance felt “too on the nose” for her sophisticated character.
Translation: The adult actress rewrote scenes to make them less overtly sexual with her teenage co-star. That’s called reading the room, D&D.
How Does This Compare to Other Westeros May-December Romances?

The Tommen-Margaery gap wasn’t even close to Westeros’s most extreme pairing—that honor goes to 90-year-old Walder Frey and his teenage bride (approximately 74-75 year gap). Let’s rank the uncomfortable:
The book’s 8-year gap between child Tommen and teen Margaery? Middle of the pack. Tyrion and Sansa had an 11-12 year gap, Khal Drogo and Daenerys clocked in at 17 years, and Jon Arryn married Lysa Tully with a whopping 48-year difference.
The show’s version was even less remarkable by medieval standards. But context is everything—watching it play out on screen with real actors in 2015 hit different than reading about fictional political marriages.
Age-Gap Intel: Despite the actors’ 16.5-year age difference, they were born under nearly opposite zodiac seasons—Chapman’s a Virgo (September 1997) while Dormer’s an Aquarius (February 1982).
What’s the Timeline of This Controversial Couple?

Their relationship speedrun went from sweet to tragic in just two seasons:
“Oathkeeper” (S4E4): Margaery sneaks into Tommen’s room for late-night kitten bonding over Ser Pounce. Dormer fought to keep this scene platonic rather than seductive.
“First of His Name” (S4E5): Tommen gets crowned, Tywin announces the engagement, and the political machinery starts turning.
“High Sparrow” (S5E3): Wedding bells and that uncomfortable consummation, followed immediately by Margaery manipulating Tommen against Cersei. Power moves only.
The rest writes itself—Cersei arms religious extremists, Margaery gets imprisoned, Tommen proves useless at rescuing anyone, and it all ends with wildfire and a window jump in “The Winds of Winter.”
Next step: Let’s talk about what the actors really thought about filming these scenes…
Did the Age Gap Change the Entire King’s Landing Plot?

Absolutely. The book’s “Virgin Queen” storyline was psychological warfare—Cersei spreading rumors about Margaery’s supposed lovers because physics prevented actual consummation. The show’s sexually active royals turned it into a different game entirely.
Show Margaery wielded actual romantic influence over Tommen, not just sisterly manipulation. This forced Cersei into increasingly desperate moves, ultimately leading to her empowering the Faith Militant. In the books, it’s paranoia. On screen, it’s a real threat.
The consummation scene didn’t just change character dynamics—it rewrote the entire political landscape of King’s Landing. Margaery went from clever teen to calculating woman, Cersei shifted from paranoid to justified, and poor Tommen transformed from innocent child to hormonal pawn.
Reader question time: Knowing the actors’ real age gap was double the characters’, does this change how you view those Season 5 scenes?
What Can We Learn From Westeros’s Most Awkward Casting Choice?

The Tommen-Margaery situation highlights a unique adaptation challenge: aging up child characters while keeping adult characters the same age creates new problems. The books could discuss political marriages matter-of-factly because readers imagine fiction. Television forces us to watch real humans perform these dynamics.
Chapman was professional, Dormer was protective, and the showrunners were… making jokes about doing teenage actors “favors” with romantic scenes. The fact that Dormer had to advocate for less sexualized content speaks volumes about the initial approach.
This case study in adaptation choices proves that some book elements simply don’t translate to visual media—especially when real teenagers are involved. The political intrigue worked on the page. On screen, it became something that required careful negotiation behind the scenes.
The Age-Gap Files verdict: When your adult actress has to rewrite scenes to protect the teenage actor’s dignity, maybe your adaptation needs more adapting.
Curious about your own age compatibility? Try our Age Difference Calculator for instant insights.
FAQ
How old was Tommen when he slept with Margaery?
In the Game of Thrones TV series, Tommen is around 14 years old when he sleeps with Margaery Tyrell. In the books, he is much younger, and their marriage remains unconsummated.
How old is Margaery Tyrell supposed to be?
How old was Tommen when he slept with Margaery?
In the Game of Thrones TV series, Tommen is around 14 years old when he sleeps with Margaery Tyrell. In the books, he is much younger, and their marriage remains unconsummated.
What was the age gap between Joffrey and Margaery?
Joffrey Baratheon is around 16, and Margaery Tyrell is about 16 in the books, suggesting no significant age gap. However, in the show, she appears older, making the gap ambiguous.
Was Tommen in love with Margaery?
Yes, Tommen appears to be in love with Margaery in the Game of Thrones series. He is infatuated with her kindness and beauty, often seeking her approval and affection.